This series of articles has examined the importance of love in the life of a Christian. We have noted that love is the basis of every relationship the Christian has, whether it be his God, Jesus, his family, his brethren, his neighbors and even his enemies. In this last article we will examine the love a Christian is to have for himself. When Jesus commanded, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Matthew 22:39), He was stating that there is a way in which you are to love yourself.

In fact the way that we are to treat our neighbors is based upon the way that we treat ourselves. In this we understand it is the way we are SUPPOSED to treat ourselves. Too many today treat themselves horribly abusing their bodies with drugs, alcohol and other harmful things. Others see no value in their lives and so they despise themselves, some to the point of taking their own lives. The text Jesus was quoting points to one who sees the true value of his own life and takes care of himself.

Ephesians 5:28-29 says, "So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church:" This passage mentions two things about the one who properly loves his own body.

First, he nourishes his body. The word nourish means to provide the things needed to promote proper growth of the body. The word is also used in Ephesians 6:4, where fathers are to bring up their children in the training and admonition of the Lord. This would involve proper nutrition and food, exercise, mental development and other things that promote good health. When we love ourselves we take care of our bodies. That we must do this is seen in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20. After telling the brethren to flee fornication, Paul says, "Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's." Notice that as Christians our bodies actually belong to God. Because of this we are obligated to take care of ourselves physically.

Second, he cherishes his body. The word cherish primarily means "to heat, to soften by heat" (W.E. Vine). As used in Ephesians 5:29, it means to tenderly take care of. Paul is pointing to the way one ought to love and take care of his wife (And as Christ cherishes and takes care of His church). We know that a husband is expected to treat his wife in a pleasant manner. Peter bears this out when he says, "Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered". (1 Peter 3:7). Treating the wife as a "weaker vessel" means to treat as something that is valuable. This is cherishing her. In like manner we are to cherish our own bodies. The Christian realizes his body is valuable, because it is the temple of the Spirit. It also houses the soul that will spend eternity in heaven if he obeys God's will. Thus he loves himself and will not do anything that will cause him harm. Among other things this means denying himself sinful pleasures. It also means he disciplines his body. That is he continually does whatever he has to to bring it into control. Paul spoke of his own body in this way in 1 Corinthians 9:27 where he said, "But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified."

Another thing involved in one loving himself is a proper estimate of himself. In Romans 12:3, Paul said, "For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith." Quite often this verse is used (and properly) to warn against arrogant pride. But notice that the writer said not to think more highly of himself. This indicates that there IS a high degree that one ought to think of himself. We have seen this in the above paragraphs. We refer to this as self-esteem. And the Christian ought to think of himself as being worthwhile and meaningful. In the New Testament we find that Christians are to be confident, purposeful, and even aggressive in some things. Such attitudes demand that one think highly of himself. Paul even said, "Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." (Philippians 2:4). Again notice that you are to look out for your own well being, but not to the harm or exclusion of others.

Finally, let's look at the wrong type of self-love. Romans 12:3 refers to it as thinking TOO highly of yourself. Philippians 2:4 would be looking out for you to the exclusion of others. This attitude is one of arrogance, boasting and pride. This type of an attitude is highly condemned in the New Testament. Paul warned Timothy of perilous times ahead when, "men will be lovers of themselves", and a number of other things that emanate from such an attitude. (2 Timothy 3:1-5). In describing love in 1 Corinthians 13 were are told that Christian love, "does not parade itself, is not puffed up, does not behave rudely, does not seek its own…" (4-5). Jesus described such an individual in a parable about a Pharisee and a tax collector. The Pharisee prayed to God with arrogance and to be seen by men, while the tax collector stood afar off and would not even raise his head and pleaded with God, "Be merciful to me, a sinner." Jesus then proceeded to say the tax collector was the one whom God would justify. (Luke 18:9-14). He concluded His remarks by saying, "for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted". Yes Jesus described the humility that must be prevalent in the life of a Christian. James said, "Humble yourself in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up." (James 4:8).

Thus we can see that the Christian must love and care about himself, but at the same time he must be make sure that he does not fall in love with himself. Perhaps the warning of 1 Corinthians 10:12 sums this up. It reads, "Therefore, let him who thinks he stands, take heed, lest he fall."

With this we bring our study on Christian love to a conclusion. It is my hope that these articles have given us a proper understanding of just how important love is in our lives. What about you? Is your love what it ought to be? Are there areas where you can improve? If so, may God bless you in your efforts to be pleasing to Him in all things.