Presented at Rose Avenue,
March 29,1998 a.m.

 

CRITICISM IN THE CHRISTIAN’S LIFE

 

Nobody likes to be criticized.  We live in a world where criticism is abundant.  It is one of the factors that has made our society so negative.  We criticize politicians, our co-workers, our schools, our family, other drivers, health care, our brethren, and just about anyone who does not see things the way we do.  It is a part of our society’s attitude to blame everybody else.  Yet, criticism is also something that is needed from time to time.  Especially is this true in the life of a Christian.  Today, I would like to look at what the Bible has to say about criticism.   It is one of those subjects that has two sides to it.  There is the wrong kind of criticism and the right kind.  We will look at both of these.

 

A.     Negative criticism is that which is unjust or unnecessary.  It is usually uttered to someone other than the one being criticized.  When it is directed to the one involved it is not constructive, but rather complaining about something one does not like.

B.      Examples of  Wrongful Criticism

1.       Jesus -  Matt 12:2 - Jesus criticized for violating the Sabbath;  Jn.9:14-16- for healing on the Sabbath;  Matt 12:24 - casts out demons by name of Beelzebub; Lk.7:34 - a glutton & winebibber & friend of sinners.

2.       Moses - Ex.2:14 - for breaking up a dispute between two brethren.  Num. 12:1-2 -Miriam & Aaron too.  Num.16:12-13 -the people on one of many occasions.  Also v.41.

3.       Paul - Criticized by Jews & Gentiles alike.  2 Cor. Is a defense of many criticisms against his apostleship & ministry. 2 Cor.10:10

4.       Nehemiah (4:3) - Tobiah criticized the walls of Jerusalem being rebuilt.

  C.  Principles and passages against this type of Criticism

1.       Often for the wrong reasons - envy or jealousy, personal dislike, etc

2.       Judging others - Mt. 7:1-5

3.       It is biting and devouring one another - Gal.5:15

4.       Eph. 4:29-31 - Let no corrupt communication proceed…clamor and evil speaking…

5.       Tit. 3:2 - speak evil of no one

6.       Jas. 1:19 - swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

7.       Prov. 29:11 -  A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.

8.       James 5:9 Do not grumble against one another…

9.       Phil 2:14 -Do all things without complaining and disputing,

 

II.  Positive Criticism

A.     This is called constructive criticism.  It is said TO THE PERSON involved with the hopes of correcting some fault that NEEDS correcting.

B.      Examples of such

1.       Paul rebukes Peter - Gal.2:11.

2.       Jesus to the rich young ruler - Mk.10:21-22

C.      Many passages deal with this type of criticism

1.       Prov.12:1 -he who hates correction is stupid

2.       Prov.12:15 - he who heeds counsel is wise

3.       Prov.13:18 - “poverty & shame…who disdains correction,  …regards a rebuke will be honored.”

4.       2 Tim.3:16-17 - “all scripture…for reproof, correction, instruction….

5.       Heb.12:9 - chastening and discipline is good.

D.      While it might be unpleasant both to give and receive such criticism sometimes, it is good and needed.  So for the remainder of this lesson we will examine how to give and receive such criticism.

 

III.    How To Criticize

A.     Before you criticize make sure of the following things:

1.       Is the criticism based upon facts? How often do we jump to conclusions only to find we did not have all the facts?

2.       It is being made ONLY to the one that is involved.  NOT in a crowd or a situation where one will be embarrassed.

3.       Is it motivated by love?  Not to belittle or humiliate.

4.       Are you in a proper state to render this criticism?  Mt.7:1-5.  Is there a 2X4 in your eye while trying to remove a toothpick out of your brother’s eyes?

B.      Become aware of how much you criticize.  Take a 24 hour criticism fast.

1.       The rules are in the bulletin.  For 24 hours you cannot criticize anyone about anything.  UNLESS a life is in danger, or someone who has agreed to take the fast is violating it. What about criticism in the mind?  If it’s just a thought, dismiss it and go on.  If you dwell on it, you must start again.  Most will not succeed the first time, but keep trying until you have gone 24 hours (including sleep time.)

C.      Other suggestions for when you criticize.

1.       Make sure the one whom you are criticizing is emotionally ready.  Choose your time and setting with tact.  Ask the one involved, “Is this a good time to suggest something?”  If they say No.  Then put it off.

2.       Don’t give an overdose.  “And another thing…”.  Overdosing kills a desire to change.  One preacher in dealing with this subject suggests only one criticism a week.  (That’s 52 a year).

3.       Give the person time to change before giving the same criticism again.

4.       Couple criticism with compliments.  I.E. - Rev. 2:1-4, the church at Ephesus.

5.       NOTE: If we will apply these suggestions to every relationship we have (ESPECIALLY HUSBANDS AND WIVES), we will become much closer to one another.

 

IV.    How To Receive Criticism

A.     What about when someone criticizes you?  How should you react?  Note some of the passages already stated (Prov.  12:1,15; 13:18, etc.)

B.      Have a proper attitude.

1.       Recognize the hand of God might be in it - Rom.8:28

2.       Let your first words be, “Thank you!” - 1 Thes. 5:18

    Why?  a) He said it to your face.  b) If its true, you need to hear it.  c) If its false, you can correct it then.

3.       If you need to make a change, then do it!  So that you can be pleasing to God and as much as is in you, live peaceably with all men (Rom.12:18).

 

This lesson has been presented with the hopes that we will all become more aware of the criticisms in our lives.  Are they the type that God is pleased with?  Do our criticisms make the church, our brethren, our families, our society and those we are around better or worse?  If you see a need for change, let me invite you to do so, starting today.

 

Much of this lesson is taken from Brent Hunter’s lessons on the family.